Weddings are great fun, but holy cow what a lot of work. Imagine standing on your feet for a good fourteen hours, sucking down two gallons of Gatorade and four protein bars, and never having to go to the bathroom even once.


You think your wedding photographer is committed because he never went to the bathroom? Nope. Trust me. There's other dark magic going on here.

You need your wedding photographer to do many more things than just sucking sport drinks, though. You need someone who knows how to manage a crowd, can very gently explain to your uncle that he shouldn't get in the way of the key shots with his iPhone, and doesn't join your guests in the conga line.

I can probably do these things, and actually quite a bit more. But mostly I'm awesome at drinking Gatorade.